Wholly Holy Way; A song & invitation.

This morning I woke with this song on my mind...

I first heard it in an intimate learning container I was taking part in, and I immediately cried with joy. The song thrust me into my heart in a way that felt like coming home. It was glorious.

And this morning I wanted to bask in that joy and glory.

I wanted to jump out of bed and play it. I wanted to move my body and sing it out loud.

I wanted to grasp the music and drink it like the sweet juices of a freshly cut mango.

But I didn't. I stayed in my bed. Afraid to wake the family. Afraid of being misunderstood by my husband. Afraid of showing the world this fumbling, emerging version of myself.

The version of me who lives a prayerful life.

Or at least, is trying to.

I’m not religious (nor do I wish to be) and yet, I desire to know God, intimately - or at the very least, come to understand what that word means to me and how I can be in relationship to it within my own life.

Sitting here now, it feels ridiculous that I let fear make my choice for me. Because ultimately, it’s not even about the song, or the search for God.

It’s about how I desire to feel.

It’s about how I wish to begin my day, and how I wish to greet my family, my world, my creations. It’s about the energy I want to live in and pour out into the world. It’s about me exploring a deep calling that I do not yet understand. It’s about me owning those desires and living in integrity with myself (and dare I say, God).

And that - God or no - can only be a good thing.

So, here’s to me finding the courage to choose love in those moments of whispered curiosity.

Live in truth, my friends.